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10/09/2024 from DailyJokes
#19092
Little Johnny’s preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station.
The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class:
“Does anyone know what this is?”
Little Johnny’s hand shot up and the firefighter called on him.
Little Johnny replied:
“That’s how Mommy knows supper is ready!”
10/08/2024 from DailyJokes
#19086
A very wise mother bought her young son a pet hamster for his birthday.
He had lots of fun with it and then one day it died.
He asked if he could bury it in the front garden, she said yes, but first suggested they make a “jam” from it, which they did. About two weeks later a
Sunflower started growing over the grave so he quickly ran and told his mom to come and have a look.
She replied
“What did you expect?”
“Tulips from hamster jam?”
10/07/2024 from DailyJokes
#19041
A grandfather is hanging out with his grandson.
He says to his grandson,
“Hey Johnny, please fetch me the cup of medicine and the cup of soda over there.”
Grandson says,
“Sure, gramps, but why the soda?”
Grandpa says, “I mix ’em together so that the medicine doesn’t taste so nasty.”
Johnny says, “Oh, good idea”, and starts to pour the cup of medicine into the cup of soda for him. Grandpa says,
“No, no, no. Another way around. You pour the cup of soda into the medicine, not the medicine into the soda.”
Johnny says, “Okay, but what difference does it make?”
Grandpa, a little irate, says,
“What difference does it make??? Well, rather than ruining my wonderful soda with that nasty medicine, I’m making my nasty medicine taste better with that
10/06/2024 from DailyJokes
#19036
After 150 days off flooding,
Noah released all the animals from his ark and commanded then to go forth and multiply.
After some time, he saw that the flocks and herds were regaining their numbers,
but he came across a pair of snakes who had laid no eggs, and were just laying about.
“Why have you not multiplied?” he asked.
To which the snakes responded,
“we can’t, we’re adders.”
Noah being a quick thinker went off into the woods to fell some trees, and fastened them together into a platform.
He then placed the snakes on the platform and lo and behold the snakes immediately laid a clutch of eggs
Because you see, even adders can multiply on a log table
10/05/2024 from DailyJokes
#19030
Two men are organizing a herd of deer.
He has 26 deers.
Seeing as the had 26 deer,
they decided to label each one with a letter of the alphabet.
So he name a single alphabet to single deer
As they’re herding them into an enclosure, they realize they only had 25.
“One of them’s missing,” said the first man.
“Oh dear.”