05/15/2025 from Daily Jokes
#20504
A monkey is chilling up in a tree, puffin’ on a fat joint, eyes half-closed like he’s contemplating the universe.
Suddenly, a lizard strolls by underneath, does a double take, and goes,
“Yo! Monkey! What the heck are you doing up there?”
Monkey squints down, grins, and says,
“Blazin’ one, bro. Come up and catch a vibe.”
So the lizard scurries up the tree, sits next to the monkey, and they start toking together like it’s a jungle version of Pineapple Express.
After a few hits, the lizard coughs and goes,
“Duuude… I got the driest mouth in the rainforest. I need water now.”
He climbs down, stumbles through the underbrush like he’s in slow-mo, makes it to the river, leans in for a drink…
And SPLASH! Falls in like a baked little noodle.
A crocodile nearby sees this and swims over, hauls him out, and says,
“Bro, what’s your malfunction?!”
Lizard, blinking one eye at a time, says,
“Dude… I was up in a tree, smokin’ a joint with a monkey… got too zooted… came down for water… now I’m swimming with dinosaurs.”
The croc’s like, “No way,” and he lumbers off into the jungle to see this for himself.
He finds the tree, and sure enough, there’s the monkey—eyes redder than the devil’s toenails—finishing off the joint like a boss.
Croc shouts up,
“Hey! YOU!”
The monkey looks down, blinks twice, and goes,
“WHOOOOOAAA… how much water did you drink?!”
