10/20/2025 from Daily Jokes
#21338
One day, Pete groaned to his buddy, “Ugh, my head’s pounding like a drum solo. Maybe I should see a doc?”
His friend grinned and said, “Nah! Skip the doctor—there’s this genius computer at the pharmacy. You tell it what’s wrong, pee in a cup, pop in $20, and boom—it spits out your diagnosis faster than you can say ‘aspirin.’ Cheaper too!”
Pete thought, Why not? So he grabbed a jar, filled it with his own pee, and headed to the store. He found the machine, poured in the sample, dropped in his $20, and waited.
The computer whirred, blinked like a disco ball, and then printed out a little slip:
“You’ve got migraines. Chill out! Get sleep, drink water, and stay away from bright lights, stress, and overworking. Come back in two weeks.”
Pete was blown away. This thing’s magic! But then… a mischievous idea popped into his head. Can it really tell what’s what?
So he cooked up a “mystery smoothie”: tap water, dog poop, his wife’s pee, his daughter’s pee, and a splash of motor oil from his car. Stirred it all together like a mad scientist and marched back to the pharmacy.
He poured the Frankenstein brew into the machine, paid another $20, and said, “Still got that headache!”
The computer buzzed, flashed, and spat out a new note:
“Your tap water’s nasty.
Your dog’s got ringworm.
Your daughter’s pregnant.
Your wife’s been… busy—five guys in six months!
And your car? Needs a new radiator.
And you’re wondering why your head hurts??”
Pete turned pale… and quietly walked out—without another word.
