03/23/2026 from Daily Jokes
#21958
A quiet, easygoing man had spent years being pushed around and talked over at home. Eventually, he reached a breaking point and decided something had to change. Determined to reclaim a bit of confidence, he booked an appointment with a psychiatrist.
After listening to his situation, the psychiatrist told him that his main problem was low self-esteem. He explained that the man needed to learn how to be more assertive and stand up for himself. To help him get started, he handed him a book on assertiveness and encouraged him to read it right away.
Taking the advice seriously, the man opened the book on his way home and became completely absorbed in it. By the time he reached his house, he had finished the entire thing and was feeling newly empowered, filled with confidence he had never felt before.
Fueled by this sudden burst of courage, he marched straight into the house, shoulders back and chest out, ready to take control. He walked right up to his wife, pointed his finger firmly, and declared in a loud, commanding voice:
“From now on, things are going to change around here. I want you to understand that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! Tonight, I expect you to prepare me a full gourmet meal. And after I’ve finished eating, I want a rich, delicious dessert waiting for me.”
He didn’t stop there.
“Then, after dinner, you’re going to draw me a nice hot bath so I can relax properly. And when I’m done with my bath,” he continued confidently, “you’re going to dress me and comb my hair.”
His wife looked at him calmly, barely missing a beat.
“The funeral director,” she replied.
