05/10/2026 from Daily Jokes
#22139
It was a quiet Saturday afternoon when Arthur was cleaning out his late grandfather’s dusty attic. Beneath a stack of faded National Geographic magazines and a broken rotary phone, his fingers brushed against something cold, ornate, and unmistakably antique: a brass oil lamp. Curious, he grabbed his sleeve and gave it a firm rub.
POOF!
A thick cloud of sapphire smoke erupted, swirling and coalescing into a towering, charismatic Genie who hovered cross-legged above the floorboards. “Mortal!” the Genie boomed, voice echoing with ancient authority.
“You have freed me! I shall grant you three wishes. But heed this condition: for every wish you make, your mother-in-law shall receive exactly double.”
Arthur paused. He thought of his mother-in-law, Brenda. A woman whose voice could shatter glass, whose opinions were delivered like weather warnings, and who had made every family gathering since 2014 feel like a diplomatic summit. He weighed his options carefully.
“Alright,” Arthur said, standing a little taller. “For my first wish… I’d like ten million dollars.”
The Genie nodded solemnly. “Granted. But remember: your mother-in-law will receive twenty million dollars.”
Arthur shrugged. “That’s okay.”
“And your second wish?”
“I’d like a beautiful beachfront house. Ocean view, private dock, the works.”
“Granted,” the Genie replied, snapping his fingers. “But your mother-in-law will receive two beachfront houses.”
Arthur smiled faintly. “That’s okay, too.”
The Genie leaned in, his glowing eyes narrowing slightly. “You have one wish remaining. Choose wisely.
Remember the condition.”
Arthur took a deep breath. He thought about the financial security he’d share with his wife. He thought about the peaceful coastal retreat. He thought about Brenda, and the sheer mathematical symmetry of the situation.
He knew exactly how to balance the scales.
He looked the Genie dead in the eye and said, calmly and clearly:
“For my third wish… I want to be beaten half to death.”
