07/07/2026 from Daily Jokes
#22351
Arthur was sitting in his usual spot at Tony’s Barbershop, enjoying the familiar scent of talcum powder and warm aftershave, when he casually mentioned he was flying to Rome the next day. Tony, who was carefully trimming Arthur’s sideburns, immediately stopped the clippers.
“Rome?” Tony scoffed, shaking his head. “Why would anyone want to go there? It’s crowded, it’s dirty, and the pickpockets are everywhere. You’re crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?”
“We’re taking American Airlines,” Arthur replied, watching in the mirror as Tony went back to work. “We got a really great rate.”
“American Airlines?” Tony exclaimed, throwing his hands up slightly. “That’s a terrible airline! Their planes are ancient, the flight attendants are grumpy, and they’re always delayed. So, where are you staying?”
“We’ll be at the downtown International Marriott,” Arthur said patiently.
Tony let out a loud, dismissive laugh. “That dump! That’s the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are the size of a closet, the service is awful, and they totally overcharge you. So, whatcha doing when you get there?”
“We’re going to tour the Vatican,” Arthur said, a hint of excitement in his voice. “We’re really hoping to see the Pope.”
“Oh, that’s rich,” Tony chuckled, snipping away. “You and about a million other tourists. You’ll be standing at the very back of
St. Peter’s Square, and from that distance, he’ll look the size of a speck of dust. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours.
You’re really going to need it.”
A month later, Arthur was back in the exact same chair for his regular haircut. Tony immediately asked him about the trip, expecting to hear a tale of woe.
“It was absolutely wonderful,” Arthur explained with a calm smile. “Not only were we on time in one of American Airlines’s brand-new planes, but it was overbooked, so they bumped us up to first class for free. The food and wine were incredible, and
I had a gorgeous twenty-eight-year-old stewardess who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel was amazing! They had just finished a $25 million remodeling job, so it’s the finest hotel in the city. They were overbooked, too, so they apologized and gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!”
Tony blinked, clearly stunned. He adjusted his grip on the comb and muttered, “Well… I know you didn’t get to see the Pope, though.”
“Actually, we were quite lucky,” Arthur said, his eyes twinkling in the mirror. “As we were touring the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder. He explained that the Pope likes to personally greet a few special visitors, and asked if I’d step into his private room to wait. Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door, smiled, and shook my hand! I knelt down as he spoke a few words to me.”
Tony’s jaw practically dropped. “Really? What’d he say to you?”
Arthur looked Tony dead in the eye in the mirror and replied:
“He looked at me, sighed, and said, ‘Son, I have traveled lands far and wide, met people of all creeds, and waved to millions from my balcony… but you must have the worst barber in the entire world.'”
