12/27/2025 from Daily Jokes
#21615
’Twas the night before Christmas, the house calm and still,
As I hunted for tools at my partner’s goodwill.
We studied instructions with hope and with fear,
Determined to conquer “assembly required.”
The children lay quiet (wide awake in their beds),
While dread slowly crept through the thoughts in our heads.
A kitchen, two bicycles, Barbie’s whole town,
And a train from Grandpa that chirped every round.
We opened the boxes—my heart nearly stopped,
Please let nothing be missing, no pieces be dropped.
No time for returns, no swaps to be made;
Get this wrong and it’s basement-bound, I’m afraid.
Then what did my anxious eyes come to see,
But fifty-page manuals, confusing as can be.
Every part numbered, each hole precisely named,
So failure meant clearly ourselves to be blamed.
Faster than eagles, the components spilled free,
Across all the carpet in wild disarray.
“Now tighten! Now turn it! No—attach it right there!
Add the seat, fix the steps, mind the stair!”
Bang went the hammer, glue stuck to a stand.
“Honey,” he muttered, “you’ve glued to my hand.”
And then it was clear, without doubt or denial,
The toy makers met long ago with a smile,
Agreeing parents should labour all night
On Christmas Eve builds till the morning brings light.
We spoke not a word, just worked through the pain,
With tired, aching fingers and eyes going strain.
The coffee went cold, the night stretched on thin,
Till the final last screw and the ultimate pin.
At last tools were packed and put safely away,
We collapsed into bed as dawn neared the day.
Just before sleep claimed me, I whispered out loud,
“This Christmas will be perfect—I’m certain, I’m proud.
Tomorrow we’ll laugh, let the festivities start,
No rushing to shops, no last-minute cart.
We did it, we did it, the toys all stand ready
The most perfect Christmas already, I’m steady.”
Off into dreamland I thankfully went,
Until one small thought caused deep discontent…
For all of that effort, that sweat and those tears
I forgot that the batteries are never included.
