07/22/2026 from Daily Jokes
#22445
Liam and Sarah were a young couple deeply, madly in love. Tragically, on the very night before they were to be married, they were killed in a sudden automobile accident. In the blink of an eye, they found themselves standing at the Pearly Gates, where a welcoming St. Peter escorted them into the afterlife.
For the first few weeks, paradise was everything they could have imagined. But eventually, the prospective groom took St. Peter aside with a humble request. “St. Peter, my fiancée and I are incredibly happy to be in heaven, but we deeply miss the opportunity to have our wedding vows celebrated. Is it possible for people in heaven to get married?”
St. Peter looked at him, thoroughly baffled. “I’m sorry, son, I’ve never heard of anyone in heaven wanting to get married. I’m afraid you’ll have to talk to the Lord God Almighty about that. I can get you an appointment in two weeks from Wednesday.”
Come the appointed day, the couple was escorted by guardian angels into the radiant presence of the Almighty, where they respectfully repeated their request. The Lord looked at them solemnly and said, “I tell you what: wait a year. If you still want to get married, come back and we will talk about it again.”
A year went by. The couple, still very much in love and eager to tie the knot, returned. Again, the Lord God Almighty said, “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but you must wait another year, and then I will consider your request.”
This became an annual tradition. Year after year, for ten long years, they reasserted their yearning to be married, and year after year, God patiently put them off.
Finally, in the tenth year, they stood before the Lord to ask again. This time, a warm smile broke across His face. “Yes,” He declared. “You may marry! This Saturday at 2:00 p.m. We will have a beautiful ceremony in the main chapel, and the reception will be on Me!”
The wedding was absolutely magnificent and went off without a hitch. The bride looked radiant. Buddha personally handled the celestial flower arrangements, Moses wove simple yet elegant baskets for the aisles, and Jesus prepared a miraculous fish course for the feast. All of heaven’s denizens attended, and a truly glorious time was had by all.
Tragically, but perhaps inevitably, within a few short weeks, the newlyweds realized they had made a colossal mistake. The honeymoon phase evaporated, and they simply couldn’t stand being married to one another. Groveling and terrified, they secured another audience with the Lord God Almighty to beg for a divorce.
The Lord heard their request, looked down at them, rubbed His temples, and let out a long, weary sigh.
“Look,” He said, His voice echoing with divine exasperation. It took us TEN YEARS to find a priest up here in heaven. Do you have any idea how long it’s going to take us to find a lawyer?”
