09/03/2026 from Daily Jokes
#22615
A woman owned a prize-winning Schnauzer that had always been exceptionally well trained. He would come when called, heel perfectly, and respond immediately to every voice command.
But lately, something seemed wrong.
No matter how many times she called his name, the dog barely reacted. He stopped responding to commands and sometimes just stared at her as though he hadn’t heard a word.
Worried that her beloved Schnauzer was going deaf, she made an appointment with the veterinarian.
The vet carefully examined the dog, checking his ears and hearing.
After a few minutes, he smiled.
“Good news—your dog isn’t deaf. He simply has too much hair growing inside his ears. It’s blocking the sound.”
The woman was relieved.
“So what should I do?”
“You’ll need to remove the excess hair with a depilatory cream,” the vet explained. “I’m out of the pet-safe brand at the moment, but you can pick up something suitable at the pharmacy. Just ask the pharmacist for advice on how to use it.”
The woman thanked him and headed straight to the nearest pharmacy.
She found a bottle of hair-removal cream and carefully read the instructions, but nothing on the label mentioned using it on a Schnauzer.
Not wanting to make a mistake, she approached the pharmacist.
“Excuse me,” she said, holding up the bottle. “How exactly should I use this? Do I apply it straight from the bottle, or should I dilute it first?”
The pharmacist looked at the bottle.
“Well, if you’re using it on your legs, you can apply it as directed.”
The woman shook her head.
“No, no. It’s not for my legs.”
“Oh,” said the pharmacist. “If it’s for your underarms, you’ll want to be especially careful because the skin there can be sensitive.”
The woman began to blush.
“No, you don’t understand,” she whispered. “It’s for my Schnauzer.”
The pharmacist slowly lowered his glasses and looked at her over the top of the frames.
There was a long, awkward silence.
Finally, he nodded knowingly.
“Ahhh… I see.”
He leaned across the counter and quietly said:
“In that case, ma’am, I’d follow the directions very carefully…
And if I were you, I wouldn’t ride a bicycle for the next few days.”
