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09/26/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9204
Daily Joke: Leader of the HMO en Espanol
Three people die, a Doctor a school teacher and the head of a large HMO, when met at the pearly gates by St. Peter he asks the Doctor ‘what did you do on Earth?’
The Dotor replied, I healed the sick and if they could not pay I would do it for free. St. Peter told the Doctor, ‘you may go in.’
St. Peter then asked the teacher what she did, she replied, I taught educationally challenged children. St. Peter then told her ‘you may go in.’
St. Peter asked the third man, ‘what did you do?’ The man hung his head and replied, ‘I ran a large HMO.’ To which St. Peter replied, ‘you may go in, but you can only stay 3 days.’
09/25/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9203
Daily Joke: The Blonde Counselor en Espanol
A blonde began a job as a primary school counselor, and she was most eager to help. One day during break time she noticed this boy standing all by himself on the side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.
Sandy approached him and asked if he was alright.
The boy said he was.
A little while later, however, she noticed the boy was still in the same spot and still by himself.
Approaching again, Sandy said, “Would you like me to be your friend?”
The boy hesitated, then said, “Okay,” looking at the woman suspiciously. Feeling she was making progress, Sandy then asked, “Why are you standing here all by yourself?”
“Because,” the little boy said, “I’m goalie!”
09/24/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9202
Daily Joke: Doctor Consultation en Espanol
A man was feeling terribly out of sorts and decided to go to the doctor so he made an appointment and showed up the next day. After the doctor examined the man, the doctor invited him into his office for the consultation.
The doctor came into the room with three different bottles of pills. The doctor told the man to take the red pill in the morning with a big glass of water, the blue pill in the afternoon with a big glass of water and the green pill in the evening with a big glass of water. The man, terribly shocked at the amount of pills he had to take asked the doctor what in the world was wrong with him.The doctor replied, “You aren’t getting enough water.”
09/23/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9201
Daily Joke: A Blind Man en Espanol
A blind man was out walking with his seeing-eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man’s leg.
Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and patted the dog’s head. Having watched what happened, a bystander said, “Why are you patting him? That dog just peed on your leg!”
“I know,” said the blind man…, “but I gotta find his head before I can kick his butt.”
09/22/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9200
Daily Joke: Double Standard en Espanol
A guy had told all of his friends about the great steak he’d eaten downtown the day before. A group of them decided to head down and see if was really as large and delicious as he was making it out to be.
The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After looking over the menu, they ordered and waited, hungrily, for their large, delicious pieces of gigantic steaks.
To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out some of the smallest steaks they’d ever seen.
“Now see here,” the very embarrassed guy said to the waiter. “Yesterday when I came down here you served me a BIG, juicy, steak. Today, though, when I have my friends invited, you serve small miniature steaks! What is the meaning of this?”
“Yes, sir,” replied the waiter, “yesterday you were sitting by the window.”
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