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05/29/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9459
Daily Joke: Perplexing Riddle en Espanol
“It’s time to see how clearly you can think,” the teacher said to his class. “Now, listen carefully, and think about what I’m saying. I’m thinking of a person who has the same mother and father as I have. But this person is not my brother and not my sister. Who is it?”
The kids in the class furrowed their brows, scratched their heads, and otherwise showed how hard they were thinking. But no one came up with the right answer.
When everyone in the class had given up, the teacher announced, “The person is me.”
Little Jeffrey beamed at learning the answer. “That’s a good one,” he said to himself. “I’ll have to try that on Mom and Dad.”
At dinner that night, little Jeffrey repeated the riddle to his parents. “I’m thinking of a person who has the same mother and father as I have,” he said. “But this person isn’t my brother and isn’t my sister. Who is it?”
His parents furrowed their brows, scratched their heads, and otherwise pretended that they were thinking hard. Then they both said, “I give up. Who is it?”
“It’s my teacher!” Jeffrey said.
05/28/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9458
Daily Joke: Mailbox en Espanol
A friend asked me to replace the rotted post that her mail- box sat on, but to save the beloved old box.
I managed to extract all but one of the rusty nails in the bottom of the mailbox. To free the last nail, I wrapped my arms around the box in a bear hug and started yanking up.
Just then a truck came by, and the driver stuck his head out the window…
“I tried that,” he said, “but the bills just keep on coming.”
05/27/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9457
Daily Joke: Smart Cat en Espanol
A man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.
As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway.
The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home.
Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!
He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.
Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen, is the cat there?”
“Yes”, the wife answers, “Why do you ask?”
Frustrated, the man answered, “Put that critter on the phone. I’m lost and need directions!!!”
05/26/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9456
Daily Joke: Take the Bus en Espanol
When my brother was about 20 years old and going to college in Portland, Oregon, he used to call our parents in Long Beach, California every time he needed money. He also use to take a bus every chance he would get to come home for the week ends, with the support of our parents.
One night he called from Porland and ask our mother if they would send him some extra money to fly home, since he was getting tired of the buses. When our father heard this he yelled from across the room, “Tell him to stick a feather up his butt and fly home!”
My brother said, “What did Dad say?”
Our mother answered, “He said, you’ll have to take the bus home, dear.”
05/25/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9455
Daily Joke: Devil Shopping en Espanol
The poor country pastor was livid when he confronted his wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought. “How could you do this!” he exclaimed.
“I don’t know,” she wailed, “I was standing in the store looking at the dress. Then I found myself trying it on. It was like the Devil was whispering to me, ‘Gee, you look great in that dress. You should buy it.’”
“Well,” the pastor persisted, “You know how to deal with him! Just tell him, “Get behind me, Satan!”
“I did,” replied his wife, “but then he said “It looks great from back here, too!”
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