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11/21/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9259
Daily Joke: Unique Breakfast en Espanol
A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant that read “Unique Breakfast” so he walked in and sat down.
The waitress brought him his coffee and asked him what he wanted. “What’s your Unique Breakfast?” he asked inquisitively. “Baked tongue of chicken!” she proudly replied.
“Baked tongue of chicken?… baked tongue of chicken! Do you have any idea how disgusting that is? I would never even consider eating anything that came out of a chicken’s mouth!” he fumed.
Undaunted, the waitress asked, “What would you like then?” “Just bring me some scrambled eggs,” the man replied.
11/20/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9258
Daily Joke: Chapter 19 en Espanol
A kid called up his mom from his college and asked her for some money, because he ran out of it.
Mom said, ‘Sure, sweetie. I’ll send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?’
‘Uh, oh yeah, OK,’ responded the kid.
So Mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package, kissed Dad goodbye, and went to the post office to mail the money and the book.
When she gets back, Dad asked, ‘Well how much did you give the boy this time?
Mom said, ‘Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20, and the other for $1000′
‘That’s $1020!!!’ yelled Dad, ‘Are you crazy???’
‘Don’t worry hon,’ Mom said, as she kissed Dad on the on top of his bald head, ‘I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in Chapter 19!’
11/19/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9257
Daily Joke: Mole Family en Espanol
A daddy mommy and baby mole are in their hole relaxing one morning when daddy mole sticks his head out of the hole and says, “I smell pancakes”.
Mommy mole sticks her head out the tiny hole and says, “I smell pancakes too…pancakes with maple syrup!! Baby mole come smell the pancakes with maple syrup”.
Baby mole sticks his head upwards to get to the hole and exclaims “I cant smell anything but moleasses”
11/18/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9256
Daily Joke: Mother-in-law killed en Espanol
A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an inspection of the place. The farmer had genuinely tried to be friendly to his new mother-in-law, hoping that it could be a friendly, non-antagonistic relationship. All to no avail though, as she kept nagging them at every opportunity, demanding changes, offering unwanted advice, and generally making life unbearable to the farmer and his new bride.
While they were walking through the barn, during the forced inspection, the farmer’s mule suddenly reared up and kicked the mother-in-law in the head, killing her instantly. It was a shock to all no matter their feelings toward her demanding ways.
At the funeral service a few days later, the farmer stood near the casket and greeted folks as they walked by. The pastor noticed that whenever a woman would whisper something to the farmer, he would nod his head yes and say something. Whenever a man walked by and whispered to the farmer, however, he would shake his head no, and mumble a reply.
Very curious as to this bizarre behavior, the pastor later asked the farmer what that was all about.
The farmer replied, “The women would say, ‘What a terrible tragedy’ and I would nod my head and say, ‘Yes, it was.’ The men would then ask, ‘Can I borrow that mule?’ and I would shake my head and say, ‘Can’t. It’s all booked up for a year.'”
11/17/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9255
Daily Joke: Why are you yelling that? en Espanol
A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job.
In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue.
The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out “green side up!”
In the second room, she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow.
He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled “green side up!”
The lady was somewhat curious, but she said nothing.
In the third room, she said she would like it painted a warm rose color.
The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled “green side up!”
The lady then asked him, “Why do you keep yelling ‘green side up’?”
“I’m sorry,” came the reply. “But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.
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