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07/18/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8766
Daily Joke: ‘Here After’ Routine en Espanol
Fred’s convertible glided to a halt on the edge of a lonely country road.
“I suppose,” said his pretty but reluctant date, “you’re going to pull the old ‘out of gas’ routine.”
“No,” said Fred, “I’m going to pull the ‘here after’ routine.”
“The ‘here after’ routine… what’s that?”, she wanted to know.
“If you’re not here after what I’m here after, you’ll be here after I’m gone.”
07/17/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8765
Daily Joke: Difference en Espanol
A teacher was asking her class: “What is the difference between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’?”
Only one hand shot up. “Ok, answer, Joan,” said the teacher.
“‘unlawful’ is when u do something the law doesn’t allow and ‘illegal’ is a sick eagle.”
07/16/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8764
Daily Joke: Beer en Espanol
Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.
The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women.
To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn’t drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong.
No further testing is planned.
07/15/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8763
Daily Joke: $64,000 Question en Espanol
Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $64,000 Question. The night before the big question, he told the M.C. that he desired a question on American History.
The big night had arrived. Bob made his way on stage in front of the studio and TV audience. He had become the talk of the week. He was the best guest this show had ever seen. The M.C. stepped up to the mic.
“Bob, you have chosen American History as your final question. You know that if you correctly answer this question, you will walk away $64,000 dollars richer. Are you ready?”
Bob nodded with a cocky confidence-the crowd went nuts. He hadn’t missed a question all week.
“Bob, your question on American History is a two-part question. As you know, you may answer either part first. As a rule, the second half of the question is always easier. Which part would you like to take a stab at first?”
Bob was now becoming more noticeably nervous. He couldn’t believe it, but he was drawing a blank. American History was his easiest subject, but he played it safe.
“I’ll try the easier part first.”
The M.C. nodded approvingly. “Here we go Bob. I will ask you the second half first, then the first half.”
The audience silenced with gross anticipation……
“Bob, here is your question: And in what year did it happen??”
07/14/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8762
Daily Joke: Monkey en Espanol
A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: “That’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.” In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.
The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.
“The bus driver insulted me,” she fumed.
The man sympathized and said: “Why, he’s a public servant and shouldn’t say things to insult passengers.”
“You’re right,” she said. “I think I’ll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind.”
“That’s a good idea,” the man said. “Here, let me hold your monkey.”
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