Find any really funny jokes? Vote for them! When these jokes get a user rating above 3, they move into the general section. Your votes will make our “Best Jokes” section funnier than ever!
11/09/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17720
An elderly couple was having breakfast one fine morning.
when the wife ask her husband,
“Are you going to marry right after I die?”
What a depressing question? Here we are enjoying this beautiful morning and you bring up this grieving question.
That night, she asked that question again and for the following 3 days she keeps bopping that question and so he finally said
“yes, are you satisfied ? “
And she said, are you going to sell the house? he said, no!
Are you going to sell our bed? Why no !
are you going to let her have my golf clubs?
He said,
” No I don’t think so, she is left-handed”
11/08/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17706
At a jewellery store, an old man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend.
“Don’t you want her name engraved upon it?” asked the jeweller.
The Old man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic steadfastly replied,
“No, just engrave it:
To My One And Only Love.
That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again.
11/07/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17703
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : Yes
Wife : Shut up. Don’t you ever dare talk to me!!
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : No
Wife : Liar
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : Maybe
Wufe : can u ever b decisive
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : I don’t know
Wife : Are you blind?
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : Depends
Wife : Oh you comparing me with some one else..
Wife : Am I looking fat?
Husband : silence
Wife : Are you deaf?
There are some questions for which there is no correct answer.
For everything else there is Google .
11/06/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17699
An old man applies for a job as a woodcutter,
but the boss doesn’t think he’s fit enough.
He tells the boss he is able to cut down any tree in a single swing.
To prove this, he goes outside, hits a five-foot tree with his ax, and it falls over.
The boss is impressed.
The old man then repeats this with a ten-foot tree.
Then a thirty-foot tree. Finally, he takes his ax up to an 80-foot redwood, swings, and the giant tree comes tumbling down.
The boss is amazed and asks the man how he learned to do that.
The man says “I practiced in the Sahara forest.”
“Don’t you mean the Sahara desert?” The boss asks.
“Well yes,” says the old man, “that’s what they call it now.
11/05/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17695
A herd of cows and two bulls are eating grass out in the pasture.
Suddenly, a great gust of wind comes ripping across the prairie and knocks all the cows to the ground.
But, the bulls just sway in the wind and continue eating.
When the wind quiets down, the cows stand up, brush off the dirt, and start eating again.
A bit later, one cow looks up just in time to see a tornado tearing through the pasture fence.
The tornado knocks the cows every which way, but the bulls just rock back and forth as they are buffeted.
When the cows get back on their feet and pick the straw out of their hide, they all walk over to the bulls.
One cow says,
“Why do we cows get knocked over by wind but you bulls keep standing?”
The two bulls laugh and reply,
“We bulls wobble, but we don’t fall down.”