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08/22/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9169
Daily Joke: Martini en Espanol
A lady walks into a bar and says, “Barkeep, gimme a martooni.” The bartender goes back and fixes her a martini. She downs it and says, “Barkeep, gimme another martooni.”
So he goes back and fixes her another martini. She downs that, and just sits there and doesn’t say anything. Finally after about 10 minutes bartender says, “Would you like another?”
She says, “Oh, no, I got this terrible heartburn.”
The bartender says, “Okay, there are three things wrong here:
Number 1: It’s martini, not martooni.
Number 2: It’s bartender, not barkeep, and
Number 3: You’re not having heartburn, your boob’s in the ash tray.”
08/21/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9168
Daily Joke: Book With No Story en Espanol
A blonde puts a book on the librarian’s desk and says,
“This book has no story and way too many characters.”
The librarian says, “So that’s where the phone book went.”
08/20/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9167
Daily Joke: Shopping for goods en Espanol
A woman meant to call a record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead.
“Do you have ‘Eyes of Blue’ and ‘A Love Supreme’?” she asked.
“Well, no,” answered the puzzled homeowner. “But I have a wife and eleven children.”
“Is that a record?” she inquired.
“I don’t think so,” replied the man, “but it’s as close as I want to get.”
08/19/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9166
Daily Joke: Valid identification en Espanol
DURING a readiness exercise, my friend Jim and I, Air Force security policemen, were guarding entry to a bunker-like structure where aircrafts were kept.
When a pilot about to do a preflight check approached without his identification in plain view, Jim asked him for it.
“I don’t see why I have to show you my ID,” the pilot snapped. “After all, it is my plane.”
“Sir, with all due respect, it may be your plane,” replied Jim, “but it’s sitting in my garage!”
08/18/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9165
Daily Joke: UFO en Espanol
A flying saucer was low on fuel, so it landed by a gas station on a lonely country road.
On its side were the letters “UFO.” The gas station attendant was stunned, but his curiosity got the best of him.
“Does that stand for Unidentified Flying Object?” he asked.
“No,” one of the other-worldly travelers responded, “It stands for “Unleaded Fuel Only.”
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