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01/21/2014 from Daily Jokes
#8953
Daily Joke: Fire Fido en Espanol
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog.
The children fell to discussing the dog’s duties.
“They use him to keep crowds back,” said one youngster.
“No,” said another, “he’s just for good luck.”
Then a third child brought the argument to a close. “They use the dog,” she said firmly, “to find the fire hydrant.”
01/20/2014 from Daily Jokes
#8952
Daily Joke: Fingers Accidentally Shears Off en Espanol
Jon is working at the lumberyard, pushing a tree through the buzz saw, when he accidentally shears off all ten of his fingers. He goes to the emergency room.
The doctor says, “Yuck! Well, give me the fingers, and I’ll see what I can do.”
Jon says, “I haven’t got the fingers.”
The doctor says, “What do you mean, you haven’t got the fingers? It’s 2000. We’ve got microsurgery and all kinds of incredible techniques. I could have put them back on and made you like new. Why didn’t you bring the fingers?”
Jon says, “Well, Doc, I couldn’t pick ‘em up.”
01/18/2014 from Daily Jokes
#8951
Daily Joke: Legal Ethics en Espanol
After drafting a will for an elderly client, the attorney announced a fee of $100.
The client gave the attorney a $100 bill.
After the client left, the attorney saw that the client had in fact paid $200, as two of the client’s $100 bills had stuck together.
Looking at the $100 overpayment, an ethical question arose in the attorney’s mind: “Do I tell my partner?”
01/17/2014 from Daily Jokes
#8950
Daily Joke: Death Row en Espanol
Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde.
Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready . . . Aim . . .”
Suddenly the brunette yells, “earthquake!!” Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.
The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready . . . Aim . . .”
The redhead then screams, “tornado!!” Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.
By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts, Ready . . . Aim . . .”
The blonde shouts, “fire!!”
01/16/2014 from Daily Jokes
#8949
Daily Joke: An Elderly Lawyer en Espanol
An elderly lawyer was about to die. One day he told his wife he had come up with a way to take all of the money he had with him to heaven. He told his wife to put all of his money in the attic so when he died he could grab it on the way up.
A couple of weeks after he died his wife was cleaning out the attic and saw that the money bags were still there. “That old fool,” she chuckled. “I told him that we should have put the money in the basement!”
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