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06/09/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8731
Daily Joke: Legs en Espanol
A few fraternity brothers needed to fill a science requirement in order to graduate, so they spent weeks studying for the final. The day of the exam arrived and they were more than ready for the test. The teacher pulled out a chart, and on it were different pictures of bird’s legs. The teacher said, “This is your exam. Name these birds by their legs.”
After ten minutes one boy stood up, absolutely furious, and slammed the paper down on the teachers desk. “Dammit!” he hollered. “You knew I needed to pass this exam to graduate. How could you do this to me?” The guy begins to leave the room and the teacher yells at him, “Hey you, boy, what’s your name?” The student pulls up his pants, revealing his legs, and says, “I don’t know sir. You tell me.”
06/08/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8730
Daily Joke: Angel en Espanol
First Guy (proudly) : “My wife’s an angel!”
Second Guy : “You’re fortunate, mine’s still alive.”
06/07/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8729
Daily Joke: Three Words en Espanol
A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail when an exceptionally gorgeous & sexy young woman entered. She was so striking that the man could not take his eyes away from her. The young woman noticed his overly-attentive stare & walked directly toward him.
Before he could offer his apologies for being so rude, the young woman said to him, ‘I’ll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100 on one condition.’
Flabbergasted, the man asked what the condition was.
The young woman replied, ‘You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.’
The man considered her proposition for a moment, withdrew his wallet from his pocket & slowly counted out five $20 bills, which he pressed into the young woman’s hand.
He looked deeply into her eyes & slowly, meaningfully said, ‘Paint my house.’
06/06/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8728
Daily Joke: Air Sick en Espanol
A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window.
A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong, mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep.
The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he’s afraid to wake the big guy up to ask if he can move aside to let him go to the bathroom. He knows he can’t climb over him, and so the little guy is sitting there, looking at the big guy, trying to decide what to do.
Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes through the little guy. He can’t hold it in any longer and hurls all over the big guy’s chest.
About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees the vomit all over him.
“So,” says the little guy, “are you feeling any better now?”
06/05/2013 from Daily Jokes
#8727
Daily Joke: Butler en Espanol
A wealthy couple had plans to go to an evening ball. So they advised their butler that they were giving him the have evening off to do as he pleasd since they would be out until quite late.
The couple went to a ball and dinner. After an hour an a half, the wife told her husband that she was terribly bored and that she preferred to go home and finish some work for the next stay.
The husband responded that he had to stay for a few more hours to meet some very important people who were his new business partners.
So the wife went home alone and found the the butler spread out on the couch watching TV.
She slowly moved towards him and sat down very seductively. She then told him to come closer. Then even closer.
She moved forward and whispered in his ear “Take off my dress…”.
“Now take off my bra.
“Next remove my shoes and stockings.”
“Now remove my garter belt and panties”
She then looked deep into his eyes and in a sharp voice shouted “The next time I catch you wearing my clothes, you’re fired!”
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