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04/11/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9409
Daily Joke: Big Test en Espanol
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students.
He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in.
The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying “A dollar per point.”
The next class the professor handed the graded tests back out. This student got back his test, his test grade, and $55 change.
04/11/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9408
Daily Joke: Mary Lou en Espanol
Lisa came up behind her husband while he was drinking his morning coffee and slapped him on the back of the head.
“Ow!” Larry exclaimed. “What was that for?”
“I found a piece of paper in your pants with the name ‘Mary Lou’ written on it,” she said angrily. “You better have a good explanation!”
“Calm down, honey,” Larry said. “I was at the dog track last week and that was the name of the dog I bet on.”
Later that same day, Lisa walked up to her husband and smacked him hard on the forehead when he walked in the door from work.
“What the heck was that for?” he demanded.
“Your dog just called.”
04/10/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9407
Daily Joke: Do Not Drink en Espanol
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink.
After a few more he needs to go to the toilet. He doesn’t want anyone to steal his drink so he puts a sign on it saying, “I spat in this beer, do not drink!”.
After a few minutes he returns and there is another sign next to his beer saying, “So did I!”
04/08/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9406
Daily Joke: Hotel Guest Mary Poppins en Espanol
Mary Poppins was traveling home, but due to worsening weather, she decided to stop at a hotel for the night. She approached the receptionist and asked for a room for the night.
“Certainly madam,” he replied courteously.
“Is the restaurant open still?” inquired Mary.
“Sorry, no,” came the reply, “but room service is available all night.
Would you care to select something from this menu?”
Mary smiled and took the menu and perused it. “Hmm, I would like cauliflower cheese please,” said Mary.
“Certainly, madam,” he replied.
“And can I have breakfast in bed?” asked Mary politely.
The receptionist nodded and smiled.
“In that case, I would love a couple of poached eggs, please,” Mary mused.
After confirming the order, Mary signed in and went up to her room for the night.
The night passed uneventfully and the next morning Mary came down early to check out. The same guy was still on the desk.
“Morning madam…sleep well?”
“Yes, thank you,” Mary replied.
“Food to your liking?”
“Well, I have to say the cauliflower cheese was exceptional, I don’t think I have had better. Shame about the eggs, though….they really weren’t that nice at all,” replied Mary truthfully.
“Oh…well, perhaps you could contribute these thoughts to our Guest Comments Book. We are always looking to improve our service and would value your opinion,” said the receptionist.
“OK, I will…thanks!” replied Mary….who checked out, then scribbled a comment into the book. Waving, she left to continue her journey.
Curious, the receptionist picked up the book to see the comment Mary had written.
“Supercauliflowercheesebuteggswerequiteatrocious!”
04/07/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9405
Daily Joke: Astrology en Espanol
First thing – every single morning – one of the secretaries in our office opened the newspaper and read everyone’s horoscope aloud.
“Gwen,” said our boss finally, “you seem to be a normal, levelheaded person. Do you really believe in astrology?”
“Of course not,” Gwen answered. “You know how skeptical we Capricorns are.”
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