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12/21/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9290
Daily Joke: Spelling Mistake en Espanol
One spelling mistake can destroy your life!
A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and forgot to add ‘e’ at the end of a word…
“I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her..!”
12/20/2014 from DayInHistory
#9289
Daily Joke: A Flower Show en Espanol
Two old men were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress. One leaned over the other and said,
“Cripes! life is boring, we never have any fun these days. For $5.00, I’d take my clothes off and streak through the flower show!”
“You’re on!” said the other old fellow, holding up five dollars.
As fast as he could, the first old man fumbled his way out of his clothes and completely naked, streaked through the front door of the town hall.
His friend heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause. The streaker burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd.
“Wow, what happened?” asked his friend.
“It was great!” he said, “I won first prize for dried arrangement!”
12/19/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9288
Daily Joke: Lips On The Mirror en Espanol
A principal of a small middle school had a problem with a few of the older girls starting to use lipstick. When applying it in the bathroom they would then press their lips to the mirror and leave lip prints.
Before it got out of hand he thought of a way to stop it. He gathered all the girls together that wore lipstick and told them he wanted to meet with them in the ladies room at 2pm.
They gathered at 2pm and found the principal and the school custodian waiting for them. The principal explained that it was becoming a problem for the custodian to clean the mirror every night. He said he felt the ladies did not fully understand just how much of a problem it was and he wanted them to witness just how hard it was to clean.
The custodian then demonstrated. He took a long brush on a handle out of a box. He then dipped the brush in the nearest toilet, moved to the mirror and proceeded to remove the lipstick.
That was the last day the girls pressed their lips on the mirror.
12/18/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9287
Daily Joke: Book With No Story en Espanol
A blonde puts a book on the librarian’s desk and says,
“This book has no story and way too many characters.”
The librarian says, “So that’s where the phone book went.”
12/17/2014 from Daily Jokes
#9286
Daily Joke: Wrong Side of the Bed en Espanol
A young priest gets up in the morning and goes to breakfast. On his way there two nuns look at him and he says, “Good morning sisters”.
They reply in a sing song manner, “You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
This stuns the priest who thought he had been very polite but he just goes on. He encounters a Brother a little while later along the way and he says, “Good morning Brother.”
The Brother replies in a sing song voice, “You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
The priest was very confused at this and goes on. He gets a little farther and he comes across a fellow priest and he says, “Good morning Father.”
The priest replies in a sing song manner, “You got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
Now the priest was mad. He continues his walk to the dinning hall not saying a word to anyone. The Bishop sees him and says, “Father …”
The young priest was not going to take any more, even from the Bishop. He looks at the Bishop and says, “No I did not get up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
The Bishop looks at him stunned and says “What?”
The priest realized his mistake and said “I am sorry your holiness, what is it you wanted.”
The bishop looks at him and says, “All I was going to do was ask you why you had on Sister Ann’s shoes?”
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