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10/23/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9608
Daily Joke: Cemetery en Espanol
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his departed mother and started back for his car, parked on the cemetery road. His attention was diverted to a man kneeling at a grave.
The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity, and kept repeating, “Why did you die? Why did you die?”
The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t want to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of hurt and pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? Your Child? A parent? Who, may I ask, lies in that grave?”
The mourner answered, “My wife’s first husband! … Why did you die? Why did you die?”
10/22/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9607
Daily Joke: Three Sons en Espanol
There were three sons who wanted to get their mom a present for her birthday.
One son decided that she wanted a bigger house and bought her a mansion.
The second son decided that she didn’t want to drive by herself so he got her a limo.
The third son thought that she was lonely and got her a parrot.
The mom gave the first son a thank you saying that she didn’t want the house.
She gave the second son a letter that said she didn’t want the limo.
She gave the third son a thank you saying the chicken was good.
10/21/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9606
Daily Joke: Only in America en Espanol
Only in America… can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in America… are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
Only in America… do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America… do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.
Only in America… do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in America… do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America… do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won’t miss a call from someone they didn’t want to talk to in the first place.
Only in America… do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
Only in America… do they use the word “politics” to describe the process so well; “Poli” in Latin meaning “many” and “tics” meaning “bloodsucking creatures”.
Only in America… do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
10/20/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9605
Daily Joke: Hundred-legged Worm en Espanol
One day a man went to a pet store and bought a hundred-legged worm. The sales person told him about this worm. It was not a normal worm. This worm could do anything as a maid.
When they were home, the man asked the worm to turn on the T.V. So the worm turned it on. Then he asked him to prepare him some coffee. So the worm did it. The man told him to go buy the newspaper. So the worm went out of the house to buy the newspaper.
An hour passed and still the worm didn’t come. Another hour passed and the worm had still not come back. So finally the man stood up and opened the front door.
“So, there you are,” the man said looking at the worm, “have you bought the newspaper?”
“Sorry, sir,” answered the worm, “I haven’t finished putting on my shoes.”
10/19/2015 from Daily Jokes
#9604
Daily Joke: It will be my pleasure en Espanol
A beautiful, sexy, good looking lady was sitting next to a guy in a plane…… The lady said to him “Can you help me remove something from my breast please?”
‘The exciting young man replied, “Wow! It will be my pleasure……. So what is it?”
“Your Eyes, idiot!”
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